I'm reading about reasons for wearing clothing. IS THIS COLLEGE OR PRESCHOOL?
keep it on the DL tho cause i dont want it getting out and it coming off like i kidnapped her or something
I wasn't expecting a boner of this magnitude
I've been practicing for you. Including stockpiling medical supplies for curing hangovers.
I have not carelessly put myself in herpes way since I got a clean bill of health tyvm.
Psh a bachelors degree is the new adulthood. We're all just pretending anyways. I'm sitting on my boyfriends couch while he's passed out drunk. In my lap. On a Wednesday. And he's a nurse. See, pretending to be an adult
Yes but from my experience being high around your own baby makes you feel like the worst kind of mom
Dont worry bro, i'll be the designated kayaker. I wouldnt want u to be drinking and kayaking.
In the middle of having sex she stopped, said "guess what, it's clitoris awareness week" and then continued fucking me
Check 'smoke weed with our ihop waiter' off of our To-Do List
Nahh no judgin. Compliments to the balls are always heartfelt
Was so high at one point last night that while showering I was worried that using too much hot water would slow down our Internet.
He actually said the words 'I miss you' followed by 'I wanna have sex with your face'. I'd say that's a win.
He gave his liver a pep talk before the vodka chugging started
We are so disgustingly codependent and I wouldn't have it any other way
Randomize