Greg found me on xtube. Who knew random hook ups would leave their web cams on and upload it. At least it shows off big penis.
yay america 4th of july drinking game. take a drink every time you hear or see a firework, finish your drink for a mention of mj or the gosselins, a shot for the words democracy,hope, freedom, terrorism
I wish i could convert my hornyness to productiveness. I would have written a fucking book by now.
like the penis drawn on my face is so detailed and well done, i'm not even upset about it.
on todays agenda: meeting with a life coach then going to the dollar store to buy batteries for my vibrator. clearly im still unemployed.
The only reason anyone found out he threw up is because everyone heard it sizzle the bonfire out.
His penis has a special gift of curing my broken heart
he told me he was watching a movie and he'd be over later and i asked how long. he said 8 inches give or take. you cease to amaze me with the guys you set me up with.
KETAMINE SUNDAYS ARE SERIOUSLY FUCKING ME UP!
She just tried to talk over a fart. The fart was way longer than the sentence she originally wanted to say so she just added gibberish to the end. Gross
You straight up wore me out. This should be a proud moment for you. It's almost like my penis is asking for a timeout. But not really
Someone younger than me just got married. Send help and vodka
I wish I had a picture of me and ron helping that stripper lick her own vagina
This is a mass text. Who in the hell shat on my stairs last night?
yea i'll help you find a man. but, when I say jump, you say on who.
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