the best part about tonight...knowing when i wake up in the morning his car will still be full of packing peanuts..and mine wont
closing bar tabs have helped me with simple math in college.
just mention it in a side comment sometime today... like oh by the way i have a daughter but um yeah my day was good
yea im pretty sure it has something do with my love of forearms...
judging from the lines on my body they wheeled me back in a shopping cart
and yes i will spend 10 dollars on a vibrating toothbrush to masturbate but not a calculator for my test
Also I have uncooked pasta. I was hoping that could get cooked at your place. Don't ask about the circumstances that I came into ownership of uncooked pasta
I hurt so much. Not in the emotional way, but in the I went to dive bars sorta way.
please, i've had weekends with less dignity than this.
I actually want to work out for some reason... I think it's my brains way of telling me it doesn't like living in a fat body.
Oh were you the stripper at that club last Sunday when i was trippin on acid wearing a giraffe outfit?
You can't say "my boobs are wonderful" and not expect my drunken subconscious to focus on wanting to see them. Btw-can I see them?
Question. There's no better feeling than clean shaven balls. Do girls get that too?
i always handshake my one night stand, im classy like that.
We were on the beach when you spilled sand in the bottle and said "relax it's vodka, it'll disinfect itself"
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