Jack off faster Americas best dance crew is beyonce themed
I was in a threesome last night that turned into a violent domestic dispute with damage to a hotel. Wish you were there!
Want any specific kind of beer?
Yeah. Alcohol flavor.
Got it. Anything but Miller.
Dude. My sister is off limits. Touch her again and I'll rip off your dick and force feed it to you.
I accept this challenge.
she carries around a jar of peanut butter. "just in case".
Well right now I am watching him use the fire extinguisher off the pourch.
You stuck a chicken finger in that stripper's clevage and said "Keep this warm for me.
This message brought to you by inappropriate slogans. Cotton candy, melting in your mouth like boners.
DOMA is dead. I'm definitely going to be the last of our friends to get married now.
I hope. Last year I got lost in New Orleans and some guy named Cookie walked me home while I cried.
Waking up with cheese all over my clothes and my vibrator in my pants is a sign we drank way too much tequila last night
So I just got motorboated by my grandma…
Dude, don't beat around the bush. We're fucked and you know it.
I just took like 30 condoms from the doctors office... no one can say I don't try to save my money.
I just discovered that jello shots are the best hangover cure
You said that last night when you did jello shots at 4am
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