Last night i stole a disco ball from a frat house by pretending i was pregnant.
i dont know whats so great about being respectable.
im glad we only fight about serious things like the hills and disney scene it
She was wearing a "Got Beer" hat and your bed had necco wafers all over it the next morning. Another story for the grandkids.
All I know is for some reason I was sitting naked in the hallway playing an invisible ukulele singing somewhere over the rainbow. I wonder why security came.
idk but i have you stored in my phone as 'guy with beard doing body shots'
We fed your dog hot wings then gave it some Bud light to drink. You're right. Dogs are fun.
Spent the entire ride home from downtown trying to convince designated dawgs to drop us off at waffle house instead of our apartment. i told them it was my house...they didn't buy it.
I can't wait for round whatever # we're on tonight.
I don't know how I'm gonna do that tomorrow. I feel like I was hit by the motorhome. LOL I WAS.
Next time you think about divorce, consider this: a hot guy just walked in and I tried to suck in my back fat.
I forgot her safe word. It was a rough night.
I really love you gals. I'm sorry again. I'm just super protective of my poutine
He was telling me how he was trying to grow up. And then 2 minutes later, he told me he was tripping on lsd for the first time.
Plus you get to call him out on being a dick. It's more satisfying than ever sex I've ever had.
Randomize