I wont touch it. I promise i wont touch it. JUST GET UNDER THE DAMN TABLE PLEASE.
I wonder if he just picks random boners to send or just the realy impressive ones
Shrimp lo Mein doused in green apple Smirnoff is a rare delicacy only a few get to experience..guess I should consider myself lucky
I now have a GPA requirement for guys I hookup with more than once.
We need to go back to the barter system so I can sell my body and just be done with it.
Rumble strips road head = magical
Getting drunk and throwing things at people isnt the same with you not here. Remember when you dislocated my elbow and then popped it back in in one motion?
I think it's gonna be hard to find a guy that won't take my consistent drinking as alcoholism
He ordered a meatball sub with a side of meatballs.
what better to celebrate not being pregnant than to eat a bowl full of rum soaked pineapples?
I had sex while you were puking this morning and I'm sorry. Kind of.
It's ok. I had sex while you were drunk crying last night. We're even.
Nobody likes ball hair. Not even gay dudes
I've lost every trace of self esteem. Even sneaking a BJ in the coffee room has lost it's luster.
I just want him to go down on me while I eat a burger. Is that too much to ask?
My vagina is the only part of me that is pleased you lived through last night.
Randomize
