I just got invited to go home with a married couple...
I'm going to appeal my grade. Is it better to look studious or slutty?
and that's why he's hiding in the taco suit
i dont know what to do
with your life?
no, with my silly bandz, im already wearing 3
By the end of the cruise, there was literally nothing in our room he hadn't peed on.
Last night was the first and hopefully last night I will ever sleep in a hotel bath tub. Sober mind you.
I'm not even gonna ask.
For the record you were pretending you were in a rocket when you drove from wawa to your house. So like 2 minutes of me listening to you making rocket sounds over the phone lmfao
All I could think about while he was going down on me was that his moustache reminded me that I want to try something new with my pubic hair.
This is like the best thing that's ever happened to us. We're getting paid to sit around get high and eat. There is a Jesus
But how will the next generation learn about life choices without a Jersery Shore?
Thank you <3 he just looked at me, fist bumped me, and asked me what was on my titty....we may cut her off
They just dared her to tape flip flops to her tits. Entertainment value cannot be found like this in any other part of America.
it's always good to have a friend that's a hairdresser, a massage therapist, maybe throw in a lawyer just in case, and always have a friend on food stamps
I just learned in class that female whales slap their fins against the water and then ten males come and fight for her yet we can't get guys to text us back
I passed out drunk in her bed. Her boyfriend showed up and told me to go to the other room or we were gonna have a threesome. I threw up off the side of her bed and left. I feel like that was an adequate response.
Randomize
