Where did you get a picture of my penis
Ummmm the art teacher neighbor asked me to pose nude for her art class for cash.
i was looking up hair salons in ithaca for the wedding and one is a hair salon/ sake bar! you can have sake or champagne while you get your hair done!
question, how would one sake-bomb while getting hair done without getting a horrible haircut?
the reason why you were crawling on your hands and knees from room to room last night was because you thought the ceiling fans were chasing you...
that makes sense.
Sorry about your blender, your tiolet, your weed, and your dog...
I'm eager to hear this explaination.
I'm making tacos. Give me one good reason why we shouldn't be high while eating those tacos.
Im about to embark on a date with someone who shit in my car. How did this become my life?
I went commando last night, then accidentally flashed a police van...They acknowledged it.
Want to get high and go thrifting? I'm trying to succeed making my dorm look like a deranged Applebees.
The other night I NICELY told her she looked like Jack Sparrow
Also, making a white Russian with butterscotch schnapps instead of vodka is probably the best decision I've made in my entire college career.
haha it's ok, I asked people. I was like "I'm high and lost" and the dude just said "That's my life. Love it."
I guess it's part of life. Sometimes your ex boyfriend becomes a drag queen.
so my parents definitely heard me when I was cumming last night...
My GF, FWB and Side piece are all booty calling me. I’m a victim of my sexual success
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