If it makes you feel any better I'm plucking my mustahce and drinking. Alone.
words cant express how excited I am to make January 1st our own personal version of The Hangover
and then he publicly announced her herpes on facebook.
Theres a midget tsa agent. Just an observation
I should start wearing my Batman shirt more often when I drink. Good things happen. All sorts of shit.
And one night I got way too drunk and thought he said call me a polish name so I called him Konrad. Now he thinks I cheated on him with a Konrad.
That's my new pick up line call me a polish name
Did you drink ALL that 151??
No. We drank all the jaeger... Then used the 151 to start the fire. We're also out of paper towels... And your hairspray is flammable.
My parents woke me up at noon to tell me my maid had found my clothes strewn all over the neighborhood
If she "comes out" to me I guess I'll high five her. That's pretty much my response to everything these days.
Yeah, it was all very half-hearted. In the middle of sex we both just stopped and looked at each other and said, "can we just sleep instead?"
That is so sad.
the sex was good. her showing me pictures of her 4 year old daughter afterwards was not.
He and I didn't so much date, as watch cartoons and go down on each other.
I just mixed tangerine juice with sauv blanc. on an unrelated note, my episide of intervention is slated to run in April.
He went three whole days without making a star wars reference, of course he got sex
No. No. Fuck you! You can do your own grocery shopping.
Randomize
