Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(440): View more from Ohio

you know you should just kill yourself when you are helping your 16 year-old sister get ready for a date and you're going out to dinner with you parents..

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(215): View more from Pennsylvania

I was like, "um, that's my butthole."

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(631): View more from New York

You drew a lightning bolt on your eye and stomach in eye liner and made me sing Poker face with you in harmonies. I never knew you were still a music major when you were drunk.

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(517): View more from Michigan

Yeah but he's impersonating a gargoyle jumping off of everything. Including the walls.

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(817): View more from Texas

I kept reassuring him that I was easy like Sunday morning, not easy like "I've had 6 shots of tequila and haven't had sex in three months"

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(617): View more from Massachusetts

theres a new barista at starbuck holy fuck she's hot

(617): View more from Massachusetts

i want to face-plant into her vagina

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(774): View more from Massachusetts

I'm pretty sure I got a cavity today due to how many times I've puked hungover at work.

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(616): View more from Michigan

in a last ditch attempt to make life awkward after i die today i want to be buried naked and have an open casket funeral.

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(505): View more from New Mexico

You've reached your one pic per night limit. To increase your limit, start conversations before 9 and submit your request for an additional pic before 10.

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