I admire a woman who can maintain dignity while puking after too much whiskey
kinda considering buying a life alert for sophmore year
were trying to schedule when i can give him head in between classes.
Just picture a bunch of Abraham Lincolns having an orgy.
I refuse to have another spring break doomed by pregnancy.
just spent $80 on an im sorry breakfast from mcdonalds for everyone sleeping in my apartment for being a drunkass and locking everyone out of the apartment at 2am.
This lumberjack with a huge beard is doing his group presentation in a dirty t shirt that says "I'm only 2 girls short of a threesome"
Did you seduce any young men into coming home to your love nest of poutine and jäger bombs?
STOP WHATEVER YOU ARE DOING AND GO OUTSIDE RIGHT NOW. THE MOON LOOKS LIKE CATWOMAN
Besides the one of you shaking your cock for 10sec that was one of the best snapchat's ever haha
Never doubt me. I am drunk and unstoppable and I will finish this book
I wouldn't be able to live with myself if I blew a Trump supporter.
The way I see it, there's 2 types of friends. Those you should do drugs with, and those you really,really shouldn't.
I was not drunk. There was Star Wars, sex, and baby oil.
that is our friendship pylon, do not lose it
fuck you.
DO NOT LOSE IT
Randomize
