I'd suck a dick for hot wings now. A metaphoric dick that is
I've been sucking dick for sushi for weeks now...hasn't worked yet :P
Is it weird for a girl to post pictures of her dildo no facebook?
I may or may not have just visibly given him head in front of three young children and their mom. They all looked mortified.
I think we should make a list of challenges so that when stuff like that happens, we can check it off. Like a scavenger hunt for hoes.
I'll go out only because I know the starving children in third-world countries would frown upon us if we let an hour of free sangria go to waste...
Olympics start in one day, that gives us 24hrs to think of gold medal worthy drinking games
My neighbor asked me to tell you to stop changing in front of their house. Do I even want to know?
Just caught my dad doing coke in my bathroom again. Guess whose getting a new car for christmasss.
Pretty sure I just convinced a drunk guy at the train station that I was from the future
He took a girl home tonight that he was trying to sell a fridge to. She wanted a fridge and got his dick. He's got a talent.
Can you bring home an IV stand and an empty bag so I can direct inject coffee for work tomorrow morning?
You know your night is done when the police confiscate your bra at high school basketball game
I had to hose off vomit off my driveway at 9 am.....so hot
If he's gonna send me dick pics; he should at least zoom in to make it look bigger.
I just met a stripper in the light of day who I ate a candy bikini off her body. This is how my weekend is going.
i had to call him over, it was my last chance at getting some tonight
HE HAS A RESTRAINING ORDER AGAINST U!!!
it expires tomorrow
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