i don't like sucking hair
kyle and i were puking, simultaneously, off the front porch at 4 am, and in the middle of it he looks up, reaches his hand over, and says "knucks." And then I proceeded to fist bump him. By farrr the best time I've ever had puking.
he was like "finding out that arrested development was cancelled" bad
there's something so ridiculous to me about watching someone with glasses exercising. it's like watching a whore studying in the library. stop trying to be someone you're not.
He started yelling "fuck the environment" then puked all over the baby trees
Supposedly i was taking multiple birth control pills while screaming dot judge me. Never going back
I'd be surprised if he had a problem with boundaries after helicoptering his penis in front of you
Either I just got hit on by a 10 year old.girl dressed like a boy or I just got hit on by a midget lesbian. Either way I feel uncomfortable
Oh god I want to come home! They have an air raid siren here that alerts their neighbours across the desert it's time to come over on atvs and drink.
I woke up this morning with a tampon in my nose and food EVERYWHERE...
It's funny when you can't take a fishing boat because you fucked the captains wife
Fuck him and his perfect arms, huge penis and relentless ability to ignore me.
I'm pretty sure that waking up butt ass naked with a bottle of 151 and a note that said "I didn't want to wake you up, but thanks" proves I had a good time....god bless America
Yea he was still drunk. He wore a Toga to his job interview.
The weekend was a blur. There was vodka and penises and orgasms. I played a game of Cock Roulette and won big
Randomize
