so he came in my eye... should i throw out my contacts?
I want you more than these girls want KFC
I am tired of kissing girls with mustaches.
There's an old bald Japanese dude on the metra next to me. He's drinking MGD on a crowded train, and rocking out way too hard to what may be the same Dallas Green song I'm listening to. Life is sweet.
dpoing straight shots of jhameson. boys are imp ressed. i apologize
the boy next to me on the plane handed me a shot glass, then a perkaset, and told me to have a good week off..hellllo spring break.
she works at a police station now. i think thats the definition of keeping your enemies closer.
She rolled over this morning and asked "did you refer to my vagina as splash mountain last night? "
Seriously, it sounds like someone is torturing a dozen cats inside a Japanese techno club while a jamaican yells random hipster words through a megaphone.
Every now and then I'll meet one who is talented in the art of shower gymnast.
how I know last night was a good night: this morning I found a bottle of tapatio, a bag of chicken and a bag of popcorn in my purse.
Taking out my recycling and 90% of it is alcohol and cat food. I am judging myself.
Woke up with a throbbing vagina and a lesbian in my bed. Then for the hell of it we had morning sex. Definitley bisexual now
I'm with the cops, Trish's gay husband stabbed himself and is framing her for attempt of murder and I'm dressed 4 the club I'm wearing leather pants leather jacket leather boots and black club top. Embarrassed
I just remembered I casually gave you a tour of the house after we boned...lol
Randomize
