Duck Duck Cougar?
I just heard a mom tell her toddler son "shut the fuck up. Don't ask me to buy you shit when i'm taking u to go see some fucking animals" welcome to the bronx.
found out this morning via facebook that the guy i met last night has a wife and a baby and he took me to his apartment where he takes girls to cheat on his wife
i mean you met him at the daytona 500
I mean I found and stalk his moms facebook.. that obsessed.
She said "I only hook up with guys I'm dating"
So... What happend then?
We dated for an hour, i broke up with her after. BOOM.
Dude. She told me she felt bad for not giving me more blojobs. HOW COULD THAT HAVE GONE BETTER?
he also begged me to fake an orgasm when he couldn't get me to come.
its safe to say i can delete the contact in my phone "brandon random bus make out" from spring break right?
Basically, what i'm trying to say is, if you don't have something, excuse or gift, to satisfy my anger i am going to look you in the eye and piss on the floor.
So after taking my shirt off, he pulls my bra off like a hockey jersey. FUCKIN PRO. Guy knew what he wanted.
I tried to order champagne at IHOP last night
We should just do therapy together, clearly we have all the same issues. It's why we are friends.
a victory without nudity is not really a victory
It's not even 7 yet. She's singing you are my sunshine to the smirnoff bottle.
Did I tell you I drunk fucked my one roommate last week
Uh no
Randomize
