I wanna bring you to show and tell
Bonnaroo quote of the day: "why the fuck am i pregnant?!?!" - exclaimed loudly by random hippie.
Vodka infused whipped cream. Shit just got real.
They went to the hospital to try backflips in the parking lot. Be ready for the call
thanks for the bloody nose. you probably dont remember, i'm not mad.. only because your boobs are to blame
You're about to fuck a guy with a sweatshirt tied around his waist like a mensurating 13 year old. Get your priorities straight, you're graduating tomorrow.
Obviously you've never slept with someone who was deliverance level inbred.
he went at my nipples like a starved dog.
Don't. You get on the 18 year old. I'll get on the 38 year old. Together we will bridge 2 decades of cock.
I just contemplated drinking cheese dip. And by "contemplated," I mean "attempted and was forcibly stopped from."
hell or highwater he WILL get a blowjob in the hammock before the end of summer.
Dude at the bar last night came into the bathroom, drop kicked the stall open and start saying lines from happy Gilmore as he was shitting, "go in your home! Are you too good for your home?!"
It looks like you got dick slapped by the sandman..
Is that strawberry winking at me??
Why are there naked heterosexuals in my apartment?
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