You don't understand, Single Ladies is like the Don't Stop Believing of the gay community.
Making the executive decision for drunk you to not sleep in the lofted bed that has no ladder
there was a trail of blood coming out of one of the bathroom stalls. thought of you
Also, the wait staff kept prematurely clearing my Manhattans. Not sure if it was an oversight or a hint.
No sexy Asian girl. No comfy bed. I'm just gonna lie here in the hall next to the garbage can until someone comes home.
I feel like a color. Like a wavy color
PS my house is a mess.
pps I have a rash on my face.
I woke up in a strange bathroom. Was I blonde when you left me last night?
Just made a bong out of a pineapple. So yes.. And champagne is about to be popped
Like he held up the condom afterwards, twirled it with his finger, and said "look at that load"
You humped everything and cried in an uber.
ITS THE FIRST FRIDAY NIGJT AFTER MOVING IN WITH THE NEW ROOMIE AND I ACTUALLY JIST RIPPED MY TAMPON OUT AND THREW IT IN THE NEIGHBORS YARD WERE GOINF ON THE BOAT AND SLEPEING IN HIS AMBULANCE GOODNIGHT
i guess i fuck people who own bucket hats so i can't talk shit
If I end up in the hospital remind me to order jimmy johns.
Why?
They deliver.
My mom has tinder, she is 45 and has her age setting at 18-29. And she still gets more matches than me
Randomize