Some guy with no shirt on and his pants undone informed us he was kicked out of the cab
I asked him why, and he had absolutely no idea.
We just made watching Intervention into a drinking game. We drink everytime someone does drungs.
I woke up with the wrong plaid-shirted guy in my bed.
I honestly get shocked all over again every time I pull his pants down. It's one of those feelings you never get tired of.
Some kid just walked into class with his schedlue written on a keystone box.
Just thought i should tell someone im on the roof, if i pass out up here because no one found me, im behind the chimney
Heard in class today that they replaced our carpet in last years apartment because they couldn't get the smell out, dude we smoked way to much pot last year.
He tried to give me a shoulder massage while i peed in the neighbors bushes to "make it more relaxing."... I let him... That drunk
My sister was not impressed when she got here. I was standing in the doorway in my underwear drinking a beer. At 2pm. On a Monday.
We were all in the pool and he showed up with a pitcher of margarita. Everyone swam over to him. He poured it directly into our mouths like we were a Sea World act.
first time i ever mailed panties back to a fuck buddy. what better of a way to say its over
For not really liking Christmas, I have an astounding amount of holiday-themed lingerie
She's hot and all. It's just I don't want to become Eskimo brothers with my sister
I never thought I could be this turned on by a man wearing racoon tails.
Remember that time I came to London for 4 hours, got hammered, cried for an hour and then left.
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