why doesnt he love me? i have tried everything. i even sang to him after sex.
you have got to be kidding?
I'm 90% sure a girl here is wearing a bra strap as a headband.
Nope it's him. He's whispering to himself and buying asparagus.
you're acting like its my fault you're allergic to sperm or something.
i told you we never speak of that again
I knew she was going to get knocked up just by looking at her facebook pics
He came up and told us to watch as he chugged his beer with no hands. Then asked if he could come drunk swimming with us.
Need your help. He's locked himself in the bathroom with his bong and his childhood collection of Goosebumps books.
He gave me a trycicle he stole from a kid as an "offering" to have sex. I couldnt say no when he went through all that.
So I thought the party was crazy before his pinky came off...
I'm petty sure you said "hold on let me make my nipples hard, they look better"
If my penis could make facial expressions, it would constantly have a smile on.
Lets both be adults and never talk about last night again.
you just missed a great speech in which i almost coined the term "ass-ian" as in "my vaginal and ass-ian regions are no longer safe"
God please dont post that to facebook.
This time last year I was crying in a church parking lot without shoes or a bra, so the years can only go up from here
He sent me a dick pic for every page I had to write for final papers (87) & brought me adderall. Tell me that isn't romance.
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