you know what its like when everyone is chanting "do it, do it"...still friends?
She was singing my heart will go on into her barf bag. celine aint got shit on her.
Adams eating in the shower, he says it's one of his favorite places to eat. Btw it's milanos he's eating, he says he loves italy too.
this kid is using one arm to help his buddy with a keg stand, and the other arm to hold up the chick he's making out with.
Walked into my campus store carrying a pitcher of sangria. No fucks given. Also this recipe is banging.
I figured out why her friends always say g is for god when she leaves with someone. She wears a double g cup bra
Drunkenly bought a $240 realtor course last night. Apparently even drunk me thinks my future is going nowhere
I am in his childhood bedroom and I feel like his trophies are applauding me and his stuffed bunny is disgusted with me. Did you know he was a mathlete?
Great sex, the promise of us mixing our excellent genetics in the future, and access to drugs are mainly what's holding this relationship together at the moment
I'm bathroom at buffalo wild wings
I think incapable of making pants work send help
Did your grand seduction include learning to play careless whisper on a kazoo or was that just a hobby
It shouldn't be this hard to find someone who you haven't blown.
Wish me luck on my new penis adventure
they gave me money. the money smells like weed. also they gave me weed
Do you knowhow much it sucks to puke in an automatic toilet? Not fun.
Ew.
It takes talent let's just say that
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