party is dying down. we just wrote whore in the yard with gas. Photos to come.
my passenger side seat is covered in alcoholic jello with a nude mannequin in it
She kept screaming "best case scenario"
Idk. I woke up marinating in beer on my beanbag. Idk what you mightve done.
Just call Katie. She's like the drunk whisperer; she can get them to do anything.
Bunch of Navy warships just sailed into New York Harbor for Fleet Week. Nobodys getting laid this weekend.
Haha yeah that's basically it. He was like "i've always had a thing for you, and even sober i still would do and feel the same way." so glad to know i am worthy of a sober hookup as well.
There is no such thing as a great breathalizer story. That isn't a thing that exists.
I just realized I wasn't at the party anymore. I was just sitting there with a vacuum.
Well, I got drunk and told my family about what I expected sexually after a good first date.
I am not walking across campus just to give you a blow job in the hopes that in return i can study more efficiently.
She puked in the bed, peed in the closet, and woke up on a Rubbermaid in the closet under the stair case
Well when we Get drunk it gets rowdy. We could always attempt self-control. But historically and statistically speaking, we fail at that.
She said "Im going to hug you" tried to give me a hickey then said her life sucks and started to cry.
Fuck. Totally just had sex instead of studying for econ test in an hour. Gonna get fucked again. HELP ME WITH YOUR EXTENSIVE KNOWLEDGE OF ECON
Randomize
