Think the blond can even spell "shiksa"?
guy picked up a cops taser, thing shot him in the neck, he went down and pissed himself, cop started laughing and hasnt called an ambulance.
Her vagina was like a man-sized safe.
You should have been there to see the look on her face when I told her that my dog gives better head than her. It was a beautiful symphony of shock, anger, and disbelief.
I'm using process of elimination to determine which of our neighbors i fucked last night.
I keep having to talk dad out of putting tequila in the milkshakes.
Ice that vagina down, get some coffee, and try not to walk with a limp. It's time to dominate, pull it together
The acoustics in my bra are fantastic.
We need to do something soon. I need like 4,000 beers and a cigarette.
Is it festive if I masturbate to Santa porn?
so I may or may not have had intense sex to mozart's greatest hits on vinyl... I don't know if I should be proud or just really disappointed in my nerdness
SO EXCITED ABOUT STRING CHEESE RIGHT NOW
When the hubs wants to wear his training mask during sex and pretend to be Bane you just go with it.
It's a long story, but I accidentally peed on my dog. I'll tell you about it tomorrow, and we shall never tell my wife.
Why in the hell is there a guy dressed up as a horse passed out in our kitchen.
happy birthday!
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