this text is just filler to avoid a lull in the conversation
They were fighting, but then they bumped into the bong and it shattered. After that they just hugged and cried.
Just so you're aware, tomorrow is "Slow Clap when you see Mike" day.
I am not ready to suck todays dick. Todays dick just laughed and came on my face.
Stop inviting me to your birth control calender reminders...my job is to test its effectiveness, not know its schedule
Lmao sorry
I feel like I have to sign a death waver before I have sex with him...
Whenever you're sad about your life, just remember that I'm on a first name basis with the late night taco bell drive-thru workers.
I never thought people would keep their guns next to their fake plastic penises, but there they were.
Overheard-"sex" and "giblet gravy" in the same sentence. Best thanksgiving ever.
forgot to tell you your neighbor walked out of her house this morning just as I was leaving shirtless
Pretty sure this ice cream truck is following me.
Do toy wanna orseer frim onedof tjose plaves? Sry textimg with globes on
Gloves*
Out of all the words to correct, you chose gloves??
I don't care. It's wine Wednesday get your gameface on.
Nothing personal but yes I would be suspicious If I saw 3 guys and 2 girls in the same bathroom stall together
Gonna do a few lines then clean my room so I can feel like my life is somewhat in order.
Randomize