Are you guys doing anything tonight?
Krysta
I'm afraid that if I tell my sister I think Zachary Quinto is gay I'll have to put her on suicide watch for the next week or so
The things that come out of my body both amaze and disturb me.
new rule: i'm not touching his penis until he takes me out to dinner.
you know, if you actually abided by that rule there would be many more successful restauranteurs in ohio.
How am I suppose to fully love you when you cant even open up and try to fulfill my midget fantasy
EARTHQUAKE STATUS DRINKING GAME
You screamed "there will be blood" and punched some random guy in the face. So no, we can't go back to that bar.
Robert just walked in drunk, grabbed my Jameson from me, told me to let him do his thing, and spilled it all over the coffee table. Then he told me to grab a funnel because he was going home.
you and him went to the park at 2am to "catch a pigeon" and ACTUALLY CAME BACK WITH A PIGEON
What if everything solid was made of oreos and everything liquid was wine
I just got chills
One day we'll be rich enough to go to rehab. Until then, fuck it.
Fine line between drunken accidental sleepover with your best friend's lab partner and gay sexathon. I did a cartwheel over that line. A CARTWHEEL THAT LANDED IN HIS LAP
"Because this is an ongoing legal matter" is how his morning after sex text began. So...
AND I NEED A VIKING FUNERAL OR MY GHOST ASS WILL SAUNTER ON OVER AND CASTRATE HIM FOR TECHNICALLY MURDERING ME
Where do you think black out memories go?
Into the dark abysmal abyss of the deepest, darkest part of your mind. It's obviously the bodies natural defense to protect you from witnessing the shit you do while actually blacked out.
Randomize
