WORST DINGLEBERRY EVER
you think it's bad that I have four different guys toothbrushes in my bathroom?
I made a vision board specifically for the purpose of boning john mayer.
just because you are in college doesnt mean its okay to pregame easter mass.
Cats found the secret coke stash again
They owe us $80.
It's legal now for me to leave my boyfriend and marry you.
Did i mention i'm like the equivilent of a prepubescent boy suffering from preejaculacy? I just about creamed my pants when he grabbed my hand..
Ice that vagina down, get some coffee, and try not to walk with a limp. It's time to dominate, pull it together
oh you know, the usual stuff. getting kicked out of bars and sleeping in cars.
Im just using you for your dick and your superb survival skills if needed.
I really just want to eat 20 mcnuggets and slap everyone with the box when I'm done.
Remember the thing I sent you? "Often complex problems are best solved by thinking like an animal." Hump away!
Blood everywhere...karaoke was nice
Took my plan b at Costco today, sample Sunday for the win.
sorry didn’t mean to call you, i was just trying to put the t-rex emoji beside your name
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