Hot guy, man whore rep, huge crush, alcohol that will fuck you up. I fail to see how this could go wrong
If you want to dance with a less than stellar Asian chick, I have just the girl for you.
when i was ordering pizza, the guy muffled the phone but i could clearly hear him say "its that drunk bitch again"
Please don't ever try giving my cat a hair cut ever ever again
Totally just met the chick getting nailed in our lobby last night. Should I bring it up?
How many layers of skin can you loose before it becomes bad?
I just realized I'm trading you a pregnancy test for the morning after pill...
It's been a bad semester.
So, this year for my birthday, want to get rip-roaring schmammered and watch my episode of my super sweet 16? We can do lines off my tiara.
He keeps texting me videos of fish swimming in his fish tank, so I think it's safe to say he's back on weed.
How do you politely tell a guy that you only kissed him so he would shut the fuck up?
I think pants incapable of making pants work
At the bar in my pajamas again
Ummm that is the 3rd time this week and it is Wednesday
Awake! can you bring me my pants...im under the couch
you yelled, puked and cried then passed out in the fetal position in your underwear
When do you think the murder is going to happen in this Lifetime movie of ours?
Randomize
