my room smells like sperm. sweet.
Five Mah tais Laser and i skill have not drunk dial you
I can't tell whether I'm throwing up blood or licorice.
I can die happy now, I have been kicked out of strip clubs on six different continents
He bought me Ben & Jerrys and then apologized for the fact that he was going to fall asleep before we could have sex
you seemed to enjoy falling down hill
wow, never heard the last few months of my life put so succint
I'll have my hookups make my March Madness picks. Win my bracket, win my heart. That's how it works right?
Sent him a picture of my pregnant boobs from last year, think he'll notice the difference?
Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face.
I like literally had a visual image of his penis going into your soul
Someone's vagina was extra sandy cause the left side of my bed feels like the beach.
I made it crystal clear I'm only upset because he's not anywhere fit to be a father of my unborn zygote
He does have a nice smile. I also like to think he has a nice penis, but that's just a prediction.
not only did I call my ex crying but drunk me also deleted the phone log so I had no warning when I saw him in class
I googled my name and pictures of you drinking showed up. Way to steal my thunder....
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