so i told him i still liked him. he laughed
well, your crazy. what did you expect?
he proposed by singing a showtune... he might as well have had a cock in his mouth at the time
if you're passed out when i get there i get to wear your banana costume and do awful things to you
When you get home we need to compare our schedules and set up masturbation slots. I'm scares of you walking in on me. Again.
Somehow after we left in 3 different cars to all go to different places we still all ended up in the emergency room
I can't make Walk of Shame Wednesdays a recurring theme.
Saw a guy throw up on himself while walking, drinking, and singing all at the same time. Hope your night is going better than his :)
just walked across campus with a bottle of champagne in between my boobs. night two and the quest for classiness is already over
Thank you for the legal advice. I hope I can pay you in blow jobs.
You get 5 min
Your time limits don't scare me, I'll include foreplay and redressing in that 5 min. If you wanted to challenge me you should say you got an hour, id be scared then and more creative.
It's national "dress up your pet day" come over. Drugs and dressed up cats..it's the shit dreams are made of.
Tomorrow is my favorite texting day of the year... It's where I send every guy I've had sex with this past year a text saying "happy not a Father's Day" and we laugh and I get so much dick it's wonderful.
All because of that GODDAMNED MIKE PENCE.
It isn't about the beer pong. It is about the destruction of the patriarchy.
So, just how hungover are you?
Not at all, surprisingly.
That has to be your X-Men power.
Randomize
