Its about making memories worth repressing
I'm hoping to finish this bottle of wine before I pass out, I don't want the remainder spilling on my white down comforter.
She stared for a good 10 seconds before calling my dick "awe-inspiring", and then proceded to give me blueballs. All in all the ego boost made my night break even
If I am going to throw out this whole "born again virgin" thing...i'm not going to do it on someone who is less than 5 inches.
Call me when your ready for an explanation about the ham in your vagina.
I feel the need to send all my exes pictures of penises larger than theirs. Because they all must suffer.
For a limited time only, free special muffin with the referral of a loyal dro customer! Have it for breakfast and be happy off your ass all day! Guaranteed! New member must buy at least an eighth. Oh and O's are on sale for 280.
You. Win. At. Life.
His IQ level must rival that of a comatosed aardvark.
I woke up to a head of lettuce on my nightstand, someones Honda abandoned in my yard, the cat partially shaved, and a empty bottle of sailor hanging by a scarf from the rafters. Oh, and 26 people apparently came though and rubbed my back in the process of the night. Happy 23rd to me!
I wish I could but I can't. No beer pong or sex on a hammock...such an unproductive weekend
Can you technically cross something off your bucket list if you don't, per say, remember it....?
Keywords: shitstorm, police, jail.
People are talking politics and I have had 9 mimosas
Chugging this bottle of Jim at the airport is proving more difficult than I imagined. TSA is not amused.
I assure you, it was not a Porn Hub Bee Movie parody.
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