So im pretty sure the object of my emotional onterest is tired of playing with me....
Dude, I found out the hard way that she wipes back to front. I ate her out and had to throw up.
last night i was so high that when a homeless person asked me for a dollar, i responded: dolla dolla bill ya'll.
decided to have an easter egg hunt this year. the golden egg has weed in it and all the others have shots of vodka. who said we were too old for easter?!?
We didn't have a blender so we made the margaritas by running over a garbagebag full of ice with the car and then stirring it with a knife in a French-press coffee pot. CAN YOU SAY RESOURCEFUL?
Saturday at 4 is jello wrestling sponsored by the senior class council. That's why my school is awesome. Boom.
Periouds do not concern me. Biploogival needs are buological needs.
Nobody is here, I still yelled for someone to make me some toast. That my dear is commitment to doing nothing.
She refuses to believe she pulled down her pants and spanked her ass in front of us
I'll pay you to write the paper but not for sex. You should only get paid for something you work hard at.
I don't think people appreciate how hard it is to fuck in a portapotty. Sarah and I had train for that shit.
Fairly certain I cracked a rib. Masturbation is not for the weak. I die now.
she's like a sexy human version of my cat. i can't catch her, and she keeps throwing up in the corners.
Lest it die in the depths of eternal drunken recall denial...we peed in the street. Middle of the street. Simultaneously. Peed. Street. Middle of street.
I am drunk and aggressive about the olympixs
It's spelled Olympics
Randomize
