Sooo i definitely have a major burn on my chin from kenny's ...stubble from making out for hours while coked up. Pure class.
he texted me telling him i gave him the clap. but i think he gave it to me and i gave it back to him
I'm officially "accidentally set myself on fire" drunk
well seeing as i got a call at 5 am from the hotel manager telling me my cousin was passed out on the lobby floor...not good
I was fine until "Under Pressure" came on the radio. It's like God wanted me to shit my pants on the drive home.
i got her number while she was sitting next to her boyfriend. her actual number. i might be a superhero
I just brushed my teeth. In the car. With watered down Sprite. From Saturday. Multi-tasking at its finest.
2 reasons we need to wear those onesies to the bar more ofter 1) comfy as shit 2) we both still got laid\n\nHow can you resist that kinda night?
Needs to be more caveman. "Me kill roommate. You watch. Then sex time with our genitals."
I've found myself wondering why I WASN'T naked before, but I generally always know why I am naked. Except now. WHY THE FUCK ARE WE ALL NAKED
I can get there in 20, one question, Drress Code? Stripper Lite (make up may require an additional 5-10 minutes), Suggestive Professor (professor Kamil's cleavage ain't got nothing on me), Daywear, Dyke (and trust me you ain't seen dyke), or Exactly What I'm Wearing Right Now. (all of the above may arrive under a coat and are subject to my level of sobriety. Which is currently like nonexistent).--xoxo you know you love me, Gossip Girl.
PUT DOWN THE JOINT AND STEP AWAY FROM THE TRUSTAFARIAN
They're letting me in by good graces, I can't show up with a fist full of dildos
Noted. Next time you want to get fried chicken and cocaine.
Ok. That just sounds baller.
there is partying, then there is whatever we did last night.
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