You seriously don't know?He was trying to arrest you and you were shouting that you were being punk'd. Punk'd? that show got cancelled like 5 years ago.
it'll be like the batcave but for manwhores
I woke up in a place I've never been before, with people I've never met before using me as a table for domino's.
I just had a brazillian performed by a hungarian named olga. Im pretty sure she was trying to rip out my soul. You owe me a million orgasms
i think when the guy sitting in the corner singing tells you you're too drunk, you're too drunk.
Based on the grey fur I pulled from my teeth, I think her vagina has mice.
I KNEW IT. I HAD A FEELING. THIS IS GODS CURSE. BREAK UP WITH A SEX GOD. GET ONE OF HIS PEASANTS.
To be clear, the next time I wake up with your dick inside me, I will reach down and grab one and squeeze until it pops like a grape. You've been warned.
I AM VODKA MAN
So do you know how we found out he was engaged?
An Amber Alert?
You can't do wine Netflix and blow jobs in the bed you've had since 5th grade with your parents downstairs
She had a baby Jesus butt plug
I don't know what happened last night. But I just woke up in the high school boiler room
Just stalked the girl I hooked up with last night's boyfriend. He seems nice, I approve.
She is beauty she is grace
she’s masturbsting in front of an open window while drunk af 9am
i thought you had class
Randomize
