Someone's got a whale tail
A thong is hangin out?
No, a fatty following them
Tonight has been like a good ass fucking high school movie
We walked in and the first thing we heard was, "OH SHIT! White chicks!" Naturally, I made some new male friends.
The National Anthem was on so I had to have a beer
Ia nefed hefelkp i am a taxi
Heading to the gym, the one that guy said he goes to. Already checked online, his class is at 5. And no, this isn't too much after meeting him last night. Stop judging me,
Either way you look at it, I'm a slut. But either way I look at it, I'm having a fucking blast.
I just had a flashback of 4:30am: me hugging the toilet bowl and you handing me a jar of pickles to open. There is something seriously wrong with us.
It's going to take a while to see a dick pic that I enjoy more than richs helicopter video
This guy randomly got in our taxi, and has now collapsed on the sofa anouncing that he's staying the night.
You didn't hold all these dicks to become a party planner!
Speaking of boners I learned how to say " jizz everywhere" in sign language
This is why we can never be together. Well that and we r married to other ppl but that's very minor detail compared to the coffee issue
I have nice boobs. Don't wanna deprive anyone of the experience.
You're a saint.
i feel like i got punched in the face....
you did....
Randomize
