I was so drunk last night I wanted to download a Busta Rhymes album.
Just walked by a guy on campus YELLING 'Im still hammered'
Met some locals. They are taking me to a place where there is topless bullriding. I love this country.
We got a party bus for the nite. I found out the hard way why stripper poles are meant for girls.
so if i die before i go back to school its because the thing we found in the hallway that i've been smoking out of is a crack pipe
I don't know who he was, where he came from, or where he went, but he just handed me a bowl of mac and cheese and left. It was good too.
Apparently you get kicked out of gay bars if they catch you putting the entire free condom bowl in your purse.
I found her in the trunk, smoking a cigarette, saying every girl should know how to get out of their trunk
I mean besides the fact someone got stabbed, I still had a pretty good night.
He only had napkins in the bathroom... no toilet paper. If I fuck him, am I settling?
It was his first time doing shrooms and we made him ride in the truck bed. But he kept standing up and yelling when we stopped so we had to keep driving
Why is there an ambulance refusal in my pocket? I'm never going drinking with you again.
YES please come visit. Lets go get belligerent. I won't even pepperspray you
you're the third guy in less than 24 hours she fucked. I'm glad you lost your virginity just don't act like you climbed Mt. Everest.
So bottomless mimosas = me waking up in a truck bed in a random neighborhood with no purse or phone or idea how I got there.
Randomize
