New drinking game watching teenage mutant ninja turtles movie and drinking every time raphael says damn, someone says april or ms oneil, and shredder appears And every time we see a mustache
I feel like today should be a " im going to have sex with you cause its raining and theres nothing else to do" kinda day
It's just a matter of time. The ball is in my court. Soon to be in her mouth.
They showed a guy on tv in a Brady jersey and a sweatpants boner when the NE offense took the field. They didn't show his face. I hope that wasn't you.
Someone else needs to become the bad example in our group
But you wear shame so well
Yes, he made a MIX CD for our booty call...
Girl re-adjusts bra, no one bats an eye. I re-adjust nuts, everyone stares.
I declared today 'Have a Bloody Mary Naked Day'. Why? Because I'm hungover, thirsty & don't want to bother putting on clothes.
Don't masturbate while listening to Pandora. Just came during a buffalo wild wings commercial and I feel really weird about it.
Dude, he wouldn't have sex with me during halftime cause we were rooting for different teams and that would be "bad juju", I had to settle for 69.
MY GOD WHY DIDN'T I TAKE PHOTOS OF HIS CREDIT CARDS WHILE HE WAS SLEEPING
Okay well for one he didn't speak any english but before any happened he made me use the translator to consent
I know you want to take a pregnancy test, but could you wait until Sunday so it doesn't ruin our weekend
His relationship is over as soon as he sees my boobs. I’m going to titty fuck my way into his heart
He stopped the gas pump at 69 and gave me my receipt. He wants it.
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