It was like what a highfive between zeus and Jesus would sound like
This soccer player girl is eating this banana WAY to slow. Too early for penis shaped foods.
Good cause the way I see it, we are down to DAYS left of college so we should have as much naked fun as possible. And Jenga really facilitates that.
IM PICKING UP BLOW FOR US STOP WHINING ABOUT SEX
whatever. i almost had sex in a car with someone passed out in the back seat. phone's not my biggest worry.
Jared is "trying to bite a strangers hat off" drunk. Oh, and that stranger is a girl at a table of 5 guys, one girl.
Because he's your one night stand I shouldn't feel obligated to extend social media to him
Don't forget the part about the bar bathroom stumbles.
Oh damn, you're right. I have to include that. You turned off all the lights with your head. That was impressive.
This guy is like Don Jon! Im over here this weekend and at least four times I've heard porn on his phone thru the bathroom door.
Just text him and be like do you want this pussy or not. You have three seconds to respond.
Can we climb Your roof?
No bitch its 2am go home.
All my friends are getting married and I'm pole dancing in a tattoo shop. I don't know how I feel about this.
They spent thousands on one day. You made $76 in 30 minutes. You should feel great about that.
My hook-up from last week somehow found me at the club, saw the girl I was trying to fuck, kissed me right in front of her, and walked off.
I feel like the physical embodiment of the pot leaf eyes smiley face
fucked one of the teachers, librarian job's going great
Randomize
