And God said, "Let there be Twilight," and it was so.
I should injure you considerably.
I kinda look like a classier blonde kenny powers.
i just threw up in a potted plant at home depot
Now I have to picture Dave Letterman having sex with all these women. Im the real victim.
I got a 69.7 in accounting. I have this whole doing the bare minimum down to a science
is asking a girl out on a date while in another girls bed in poor taste?
It's refreshing to see you in something that is stained with something other than vomit and spilled alcohol.
I voted for him because his wife supports his raging sex life.
All I know is that either you or I told a black guy that he looked like usher and he was sexy and that is our confession
I though us hooking up in the field was your way of saying you were an outdoors person
FYI: Brian said he left me in the bathroom Friday night to shower and 45 minutes later found me with a towel around my head, my pants on and holding my boobs. No more Jell-O shots for me.
Good morning! Or after noon. Sorry for falling asleep in you
she stuffed her marc jacobs purse full of cereal
classy
No. I'm home alone and 100% dickless. I hate my life.
No offense, but I don’t think I would want to see him in anything skimpier than a hazmat suit.
Randomize
