I think I'm going to be in trouble for sneaking out last night. My Dad saw me drive up this morning when he was leaving early for work.
What'd you say?
I told him I was sleep driving
Dude i dont know how people can complain that waterboarding is such a bad thing. I just sat through a fucking puddle of mudd show. Now thats torture
Baffled as to how I'm gonna get 150lbs of sand out of my basement.
dude i've broken up a marriage, I think I can handle a simple engagement.
She kept saying the tortilla understood her. I honestly don't know where she found a tortilla at the pool.
Hey if there is a better reason to go drink then "I've been fucking robbed!" I have yet to hear one. Also, I've been fucking robbed.
Handicvap rails on the toilet atre soooooo fuckin handy right nmow.
Pavlovs bj experiment 2012. Welcome to the program.
Just resonded to a booty call with "how much effort is required on my part?" I think I've finally reached the point of smoking too much pot
Your smile makes me feel like I'm frolicking through a field of gummy bears.
don't judge but I think I'm gonna go fuck a dad this weekend
if you were broke and planning on using koolaid as a tequila chaser which flavor would you pick?
It true. It written in the Bible.
Yes I remember that, right next to the passage where jesus said unto his disciples, pop molly, fuck bitches amen
You said the best orgasm you ever had, you gave to yourself. your boyfriend looked really disappointed. so did half the room.
I forget how to act sober
Randomize
