I'm officially my mother.. Smoking in the garage pretending to take the dog out in a big ugly jacket
how do you say happy birthday to the guy that almost got you pregnant? i cant just write the same thing as last year.
Ya well my good-girl image was pretty much blown when he found out I'm going to jail soon.
Just sucked my third dick in the past twelve hours. I must want AIDS.
Operation liquormelon is in full effect. We may die tonight.
I officially became the girl who let a guy get her off under the covers last night while her roommate and a friend were there. He was impressed by my ability to stay quiet and stay relatively focused on the conversation...
I am so ashamed of you, and yet so proud.
This guys mom bought us a 24 pack and drove me and 8 others to a frat house... Hello moms weekend.
You just stood up, raised your glass and said, "I'd like to thank the academy" then fell through a glass table. THAT'S why we cut you off.
You know where a good place to spend summer is? In your head. High as shit. It doesn't matter where you are.
Its honestly only a matter of time before I punch him in the face... I'll try to control myself until you guys break up
I smoked then listened to a voicemail from my mom...I ended up yelling at my phone cause she wasn't answering me. Forgot it was a recording.
You ask to touch his thighs ten times and called them magnificent.....need I say more
at least he now gets to tell people how he once threw a party so epic that the next day they had to clean some girl's body paint off the ceiling
11:30pm - Shots together. 12:15pm Shots together. 12:45pm Shots together. 9:30am Plan B's together.
sober me is not impressed with the quality of people that drunk me gives our phone number to
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