I prefer the term 'tenderly watching'
such a stalker...
she wanted to love me. she just didn't know it yet.
Enough with studying for finals. Time to put that my little pony coloring book to use.
a kid in a transformers shirt tried to pick me up last night at work. he also rolled up on a bicycle, the kind with pedals. do i look that easy?
After we had sex, she played this little piggy with my toes
I discovered the grieving process is shock, denial, anger...and then something about drinking until you puke on yourself
she said if I bought her franzia she would blow me, and she would fuck me if I splurged on martini and rossi. Franzia it is
Maybe the downfall to liking really smart guys is that they're to smart to think about sex all the time.
Dude cabbage spilt on the floor, and now danielles rolling it. Happy st party's day.
I wonder what chicks would think if they learned that when we add them on fb we email their bikini pics to each other.
Dear god. Please. Please do NOT deprive yourself of dick for 90 days. Blood will spill. Wolverines will howl. I can't handle that kind of terror.
so "excuse the stench" wasn't the correct thing to say when your boyfriend's parents walk in on you shitting. Live and learn
Just ate Panda Express. Fortune cookie had no fortune in it. I actually prefer this. Less broken dream potential.
You just get me
I'm the wind beneath your wings, bitch
I am far too sober to understand you right now. sorry.
MY DINNER LAST NIGHT CONSISTED OF SEMEN AND A PROTEIN SHAKE... MY TRAINER WOULD BE PROUD I DIDN'T HAVE CARBS!
Randomize