Man, i was looking at the pictures i took last night in one i was on the Kentucky line fist pumping with a hobo..wth happened?
I love watching the kids I sold drugs to score touchdowns
I don't think he wanted to hear that my most serious relationship was my 1 1/2 year fuck buddy... I think he figured out that's where he's heading
We both bought three foot bongs...going to race to see who can smoke a mile first.
You kept telling me how warm your bag of vomit was and asked me if i wanted to feel.
More or less binge drinking as a giant grape seemed justified
What bar did i puke in last night
by bar you must mean bars and by in you must mean on
You took my underwater blowjob virginity.
So again no comment on the cleavage. I'm a bit disappointed. If those girls come together to make cleavage AND I send you a pic of it, you have to comment on it. That's like relationship 101.
Cant really say how it happened but i woke up in the middle of the night and somehow pissed all over connors dad
You merely adopted the alcohol. I was born into it. Molded by it. I didn't see the hang over until I was a man and by then it was only blinding.
You said you couldn't use your body anymore so you made me push the buttons on your phone while you made alien sound effects
It was like being run over by an orgasm freight train.
I woke up to a bum peeing outside my window, and he said, "This is embarrassing for you."
I have cats now. Five of them.
Have you considered starting a global domination firm?
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