They say rihanna has been dating several mets players. They go on to say that she feels safe with them because they can't beat anybody.
Men with bald spots should not have mohawks. Just in case you didn't know.
Sarah Palin is going to have a show on the discovery channel...Can I get a moment of silence for knowledge?
He insisted on sleeping in my bed. Had he taken all of my obvious hints I would have sucked his dick. He only wanted to snuggle. My world has been turned upside down.
im youtubing treadmill accidents. this is what i do at 2:10am
You said "It's ok guys, I know I'm not really a turtle" and then tried walking on the lake.
You SHOULD feel empty, we were at the top of our game, and by that i mean snorting things we don't understand and only a few steps away from adultery.
so I was at the house for 3min to grab my bathing suit & tequila. You know, the go-to weekend combination
I have invented a new sport: freshman-watching. I'm sitting on our porch literally dying watching the freshmen run around trying to find parties
He set two of my ex boyfriends on fire at two different bars without anyone knowing it was him or how it happened either time. He might be a fucking super hero
I mean, they were small fires and no one got hurt, but still. Awesome.
I probably should have eaten more before I started shotgunning beers at 9am, but it was so much damn fun.
Visions of polite missionary are dancing in my head right now kinda and it alarms me
We just had sex in the shed while having a conversation about cheeseburgers...so that's how my day is going
woke up between a girl's legs. make your own conclusion.
Whose the chick running for dorm president promising bigger dicks and softer toilet paper? That’s who I m voting for
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