Liz and I are now offficially highest. OH, and your girlfriend may be a vampire. Heads up. SPARKLESSSSS
Put my glitter back.
I'm getting very good at recycling my hook ups. So even though i'm having more sex... I'm the same amount of slutty.
Yes! I like to call that picking from the buffet!
If I had known I was gonna take my tights off and throw them over the balcony I would have shaved my legs.
Motor boating, judging by the amount of lipstick I found I would say between 6 to 8 times
im downtown. alone. lost. drunk. dressed as santa. dont find me. i just heard someone say mechanical bull.
shes trying to book us all flights to Ireland..I let her get mine and yours but stopped her when she tried booking the guy next to her at the library
You went down on Rachel in front me last night. Worst. Brother. Ever.
My cab driver just started a conversation with "Three years ago I pleaded guilty..." Check on me later tonight please.
I like to play this game where I try to reach orgasm before my bathtub overflows....lost tonight.
PUB CRAWL IS THE WEEK I COME BACK FROM NOLA OMG OMG OMG. Has it been a year already since I tried to make out with you and you let a bar tender take a shot out of your cleavage? Time flies.
You can cuddle me. Word on the street is my ass is ridiculous.
there is such a gross feeling of satisfaction when the married guy i used to hook up with likes my facebook status.
I don't want to hook up with him sober. That's pretty much like saying I love you.
I'd like to know who hasn't seen my tits tonight.
I ripped ass in on and around her face during a hard 69. I don't think she'll ever call me again.
Randomize
