I'm at his house. He has VELCRO shoes. I'm too desperate to leave...I may need help in thee life dept
Just found pics of us from Mardi Gras last year. Your boob job really is better than mine.
I'm taking her home. She just told a 90 yo woman in a packers hat to "suck her cock".
I love our strategizing... I wish we used the same passion for planning our lives and future that we use for planning our drunken escapades... We would both be doctors by now, I swear
I woke up and he was starring at me and then said "do you believe in miracles"?
After he finished going down on me he came up from under the covers, threw his hands into the air and shouted "take that lesbians!" and finished with "and we have dicks!"
The only difference is Iv never super glued straws to your nipples.
And then he said he would build me a mountain dew water fountain
Marry him now.
My booty call just moved 2 min from my house
This has pregnancy written all over it
I think my body is a cloud. This mixture of things is heavenly. Dare was wrong, drugs are awesome.
His roommates came in the room and were throwing snowballs at us while we were hooking up.
I GOT THE PAPER IN AT 11:58
EAT MY ENTIRE ASS COM 101
this is the second day the intern has gotten me coffee. he either wants to bang me or thinks I'm more important than I am.
either way he's in for disappointment
Fortunatly we found him, he was on my roof. Unfortunatly, we can't say the same for his pants. Still looking. BRB.
This girls ass literally just fell out of her jeans in front on me on the escalator. Going commando on a Monday morning is a bold move.
Randomize
