You would DIE at the bar we're at right now. All indian/asian med students, I swear
Asian doctor ratio. So hot. I would've gone into heat
He's telling me stories about how he made out with a 14 yr old when he was 22. I'm going home.
Drinking mikes hard & watching the swan princess. i fucking LOVE college
last night they convinced you that a sharpie was a new style of chap stick... so when you wake up, you might want to do something about that
The little things make me happy. Little dicks do not.
Don't freak out about the couches in the driveway. We tried to unpack the uhaul drunk.
Are my feet made of real feet?
I woke up locked in the bar...this has redefined partying.
Unless you've also woken up wearing a poncho and a ring pop, I suggest you don't judge me. Okay, I even judged myself for that.
We bought only tequila and Twister. And you're STILL surprised you got pregnant?
I'm pretty sure the Jahovah's witness only came to our door because the front says "Twerk Or Treat"
I don't think my professor is going to remember the Halloween party... or the fact that he made out with a priest.
He wants another date...I mean he's cute, but I just am not ready to give up my glamorous single-girl lifestyle here.
you mean the one where you drink out of the carton and don't wear pants?
Yeah, and pee with the door open. It's the little things.
All of my friends are talking about changing their lives because they have an alcohol addiction and I'm over here reminding my boss that it's national beer day.
just showered sitting down cuz standing seemed like too much work, thursdays need to stop making me their bitch.
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