I know they r crazy. However porn on a big screen is an easy commitment. They come with mute, stop, fast fwd and replay buttons. if only all women came that way...
I need to surround myself with more reliable stoners...
found an empty one..2nd door on the right...i'm already naked.
My drug dealer asked me out. What's the protocal for this?
Now that my 6 day bender is behind me, I just realized I might have been the one who took a shit in our mailbox that past few days.
why would you automatically assume i'm high...
you just told me you're eating the powder of a lemonade mix.
if i got ashes i think they'd burn a hole into my head with the amount of sins i've committed this year alone and it's only february
Would it be sharing too much to tell you that my nipples hurt so much that I couldn't comfortably go down the stairs?
Dude. I am seriously trying SO hard not to be amused by Honey Boo Boo. But the fact is, she just got a mani pedi with her gay uncle Poodle, and he got a discount because he only has nine toes, and I am ALL IN.
What's great about college is that i can eat chocolate cereal for every meal and call it a money saving technique.
Circle jerk is a real thing. It looks like five innocent virgins in a closet at my brother's bar mitzvah. Yeah, I walked in on that.
it's ok, no one ever died fom being sticky.
i've gotta research that and get back to you.
Binging muscle relaxers because when ur 33 you can no longer SHAKE IT LIKE A POLAROID PICTURE for 2hrs w/o consequences. Fuck you, Age.
I like that you use a Disney movie to describe the starting of our BDSM relationship, lmao
My co-worker accidentally texted me regarding the threesome him and other one are planning.
Randomize
