I am so getting Plan B when we get home. Not getting knocked up by a dude with a hair piece.
But it's not about our feelings, it's about making the men we sleep with feel awful about their lives
Its only.eleven and we are already chasing a man on a bike with a bag full of burger king
I gave up. I'm crying over my notes. Oh, ya know, just another drunk finals week
Dude, just be careful. Her invitation for BJ is just a trap for her to stick her finger up your ass.
It's like getting ready for my vaginas own execution
FONT CPME TO THE TRUK. I REPATE SONT COME TO THE TRUCK WERE GETTON FRAEKY
You don't have anything to lose--we've established that he's not going to murder you and he smells good.
Her boobs take up a lot of room so God had to skimp on the brains
My friend asked me if I got home okay and I replied "Glad teat. Goodnight." Usually I can translate drunk me, but I'm even lost on that one.
I may or may not be setting up an encounter with a foot fetishist just because I'm curious.
Sorry for peeing on you and your bed last night.
I see myself subsisting on tequila for the next several days.
conclusion: canadians have really freaky sex
OMG OMG OMG I just throwed up in his pillow case when he wentto start the sho wer, time to grab my bra and bounce!!!
Wow.
Randomize
