she farted while i was going down on her. not doing that again
i don't remember but I assumed it was bad when I woke up with directions from his house to mine already pulled up on my phone
SHE has hooked up with both me and my sister. I don't even know what to say. If she goes for my parents next I may have to kill her
It was odd. His friends dick tasted the same as his. Friends are beginning to have to much in common
There needs to be waaaay more alcohol in my apartment if I am going to survive being unemployed
He drives a BMW. I have to fuck him. Girl Code Rule #26.
Still borderline I believe. As bad as this sounds, I feel God owes me one here and should not let his grandmother die till after my birthday
I gave up. I'm crying over my notes. Oh, ya know, just another drunk finals week
foreskin is a definite game changer
I just watched this dude try to convince this girl to go home with him. She was like, That's cute, you're cute.and she just walked away. Man I'm so not drunk enough to be around this level of sad.
4 out of 7 roommates in one month isn't that bad if you think about the fact that 3 of them were in the last 24 hours
All of my friends are talking about changing their lives because they have an alcohol addiction and I'm over here reminding my boss that it's national beer day.
So I've decided that blue balls for lesbians is rainbow balls and the struggle is real
He sent me a text saying his breakfast today was leftover mead and some fruit salad
So. My mom went grocery shopping for me while I was at work & brought the food here. Cool bc my dildo was laying on the counter. Forgot I left it out. I am sure she saw. Im mortified.
Randomize