why is it that everytime a half black man enters something boring, it suddenly becomes sexy to people? golf? the presidency?
I just hope this isn't happening Final Destination style
Travis Barker would totally be Devon Sawa in this scenario
you just broke rule number 1. If you can't lift her up don't date her
Waldo just asked us for directions. Even he doesn't know where he is.
a bus full of elementary school kids may or may not have seen me pissing off my front porch this morning
I hope he didn't notice that my shirt was inside out when I told him I didn't have sex with the guy. Kind of a dead giveaway.
Well right now I am watching him use the fire extinguisher off the pourch.
The gay is strong with you! You're more concerned about my outfit than my safety.
So I vote that we skip the bowling and just go straight to destroying our livers.
All I see when I think of you are dancing penis angels around your head.
So I just sent my ex a video snap chat of me getting head from some Venezuelan hottie with the caption I still love you. Think she'll take me back?
BOOOOOOOOOOOO *takes away your hoe card*
You peed in a public fountain and then felt bad so you put dish soap in it; 4 ft tall bubbles.
I think I achieved my goal of being high for 24 hours in the same week I promised myself I wouldn't smoke anymore
FIVE TIMES AND I HAVENT GOTTEN OFF ONCE
literally yelled NOOOO right before he finished .. yelled “five times and I still haven’t gotten off” when he was still inside me ..
Said “don’t worry I’ll get myself off tomorrow” to top it all off
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