I wish my penis had an off switch
Who did Billy Mays play for?
I showed him my bush... on skype.
Girl next to me just said "as a guy I used to sweat but not I don't. it's awesome" Oh. My. God.
They are pre-gaming a trip to congress...not sure how politically correct the group is.
walking in back of a girl wearing booty shorts, a halter and a bracelet that says trainwreck. I don't get it. The first day of nice weather and all the whores come out, are they like hibernating bears or something?
Good news.. I found out what I did Saturday night. Bad news... I found out what I did Saturday night.
Dont worry about getting me anything... Just put a bow on your ass.
Deal.
you took a potato out of your pocket and just started eating it raw. don't know where the potato came from though
21st birthday = success
DR UNK TOWN USA
TEAM USA GO AMERICA
He was spooning with the dog when I came home. Now shes afriad to go near him. Should I ask?
I brought a travel sized bottle of baby powder and sprinkled it on all of the couples making out on the wall in the basement
It's official cum is not a great leave in conditioner
It's not even noon and I've had 3 people call me a savage, one of them said it in reference to the blow job I gave them. So I guess you could say it's going to be a good weekend
I thought it turned out lovely. You got to see me almost naked and I got to be stoned to the point I was content with
Wtf when were you almost naked??
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