K got coke dick during a threesome with two strippers. Say no to drugs.
Broke my phone, have no voice AND I was blackout by 3 p.m...I'm betting I had a great time.
Dating is not our generation's strong point. We're an era that's good at getting laid.
Its like fucking yourself in the head with a weed strapon
debating whether or not to save the package from my first plan b pill. it would be a nice addition to any baby book.
I think he thought he was a gentleman because he bought me the most expensive plan b at cvs
I can't figure out how to get this beer bong in my carry on without airport security questioning me as it goes through the x-ray.
I don't want to talk. I just want to motorboat those tits
Notice: I will be intoxicated and in your area this evening. To unsubscribe from my sexual solicitation list, reply 'fuck off'.
The fire department told the police that I was inside the burning building trying to pee in the rest of the electrical Outlets. Booyaka.
I just dumped bong water and Bacardi out of my purse into the trash can. Everything in my purse is soaked. I hate Sundays.
dude i'm so hungover my hair hurts
maybe if I avoid him long enough we could skip the talking part of "we need to talk"
By talk him into it I assume you mean blow him into it.
COCAINE IS GR8
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